Sunday, October 21, 2007

How to Procrastinate 2nd Edition (Junior Year Style)

1. Whine about absurd length of paper (500 word max).
2. Open Word. Title paper "Poop on a Stick and Tintern Abbey."
3. Go into hallway and play with caution: wet floor cone.
4. Convince drunk hall mate to wear wet floor cone as a peg leg.
5. Write one sentence of paper. Delete it. Write "Blah blah blah blah" instead.
6. Taco Bell!
7. Get mooned through the window of Taco Bell. Laugh/recover from shock and order another taco.
8. 1-hour Facebook session.
9. Watch Dirty Dancing.
10. Holler at drunk boys outside. One is wearing camo. The other asks if you are Swedish and if you can yodel. Discuss/yodel for 20 minutes through the window.
11. Write 2 words of paper and stare incomprehensibly at the poem you are supposed to be writing about.
12. Go to bed.

The next day...

13. Go to class until 3. Come back and sit around until 3:30. Write paper in 15 minutes and drop into prof's box at 4:20 (it's due at 4:30).
14. Whine about how hard assignment was.

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