WHY CAN'T I HAVE BULLETS, BLOGGER?

- You know it's been a good night when the rug's bunched up in the corner and your roommate's porcelin squirells are broken.

- I could really go for some arts n' crafts right now.

- I don't care how much of a "dog" name it is, I'm going to name one of my daughters Scout.

- I like how there are tractors constantly going up and down the road outside my window.

- Eyelash curlers still freak me the hell out. They're like mini guilloteines.

- Working at the library has given me a lot of insight into the bizarre faculty we have here. For example, one of our history professors ordered like 7 pro wrestling DVD's yesterday.

- I'm disgusted with how vulnerable I am to advertising. You know that new commercial with Beyoncé singing "Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend"? Yeah, I don't even know what it's for but I want it. Ooh look, a cheesy beefy Taco Bell thing...

- I wish men were mandated to dress like they were in the Elizabethan period, with those crazy neck frill doo-dads and pantalounes. Just men though.